So what is a fear? Everybody has them one way or another.
I’m not talking about the fear when there’s a physical threat. I’m talking about the ones keeping you from living your Life to the fullest every single day. The ones in your head.
A fear is a feeling created by the mind (so not a real feeling) that tells you something about something you really have no idea about. A fear is a false feeling created by the mind about the unknown. How many times have you freaked out about something in advance and then after you did whatever it was, you realized it wasn’t that bad and the freaking out was totally unnecessary?
A fear is not real, it’s just an illusion. The more you think about it the bigger it gets, and at times it takes over your whole world. The second you give it a value it thrives and grows and gets massive proportions. Fear feeds on fear and gives birth to anger and hate.
I know once it get’s its nasty hold on you it’s really hard to shake, but you can. It’s possible.
I was scared of absolutely everything when things started to change so dramatically in my Life when my dad died. The panic attacks and anxiety felt like they were going to tear me apart. I was literarily on the floor with my whole body cramping, feeling like an elephant was on my chest not being able to stand up or move my arms or legs. It paralyzed me.When that happened I couldn’t speak, stand or breathe, I thought I was gonna die.
When things were at their worst with my mom being sick I had to some days, just to be able to breathe, lay on my back on the floor doing nothing just to keep it together keeping my chest from exploding from all the pain inside. So I know how intense fear can get, but I also know once you learn how to change how you deal with it, the whole experience of fear changes.
An amazing way of killing a fear is to take the fear as far as you can in terms of, for example if the fear you have right now is that you are getting a new haircut and that is freaking you out cause you don’t know if it will look good on you. When that happens, ask yourself – What is the worst possible outcome with a new haircut?
You might not think it suits you; other people might not according to you find you as attractive. That’s it. That’s the worst possible outcome with a new hair due gone bad and in the end you are probably pleasantly surprised by the result and grateful you did it. Even if it you don’t end up liking it, what good does it do you to feel bad about it even before it happened?
To worry about a future that hasn’t happened yet is such a tremendous waste of energy. The past doesn’t exist anymore either so let that one go too. Don’t waste your energy feeling bad about something that was, cause it is no more. The future hasn’t happened yet and if you are not in a place of consciously co creating it yourself, then you have no idea what’s gonna happen, so worrying about a “bad” outcome when you really have no idea, doesn’t make sense does it? It just makes you feel bad and where’s the good in that?
To choose to feel great all the time knowing that whatever happens happen for a reason and exactly as it should be, also following what feels right, the perfect doors will open up for you. Whenever a fear sneaks up on you try to say or think this to yourself;
It’s Not Real. It’s all in my head .It’s Not Real.
What about the times when you want to ask your boss about something you want or need, and you keep putting it off cause you don’t want to be a burden or an inconvenience, not giving yourself any value whatsoever and making yourself feeling small and unworthy. Imagining every sort of crazy scenario taking place making you feel bad for no reason.
It’s not real, you have no idea what’s gonna happen and most likely you’ll get a smile and a yes and leave their office wondering why you made such a big deal out of the whole thing. Whenever I face a fear I realize that it’s never as bad as I paint it out to be. The only reason I think that to start with is cause I’ve in the past let my sneaky mind play tricks on me.
Quiet your ego and the drama will stop. Whenever you hear that voice in your head telling you it’s this or that, whenever there is a judgment in what’s said, choose to actively ignore it cause it’s not real. Fears don’t exist to begin with so once you call them out, they have no choice but to disappear cause they were never really there. Remember that every time they appear.
Take this moment right here, when I’m writing about fears. My mind is going-what if people this and that, what if, what if, what if, yada yada yada -SHUT UP! It’s hysterical when you think about it the never ending drama going on up there. Once you are aware of it you will understand what I mean.
A common fear of the unknown is Death. But what if death is just a doorway to a new experience. Like a passage.
Then it’s been prejudged as something bad wrongfully, and all the anxiety related to it has been in vain. Someone at some point has been afraid of the unknown in the Death Experience and made the judgment that it’s bad, and a lot of people has followed. But what if this was actually something that was meant to be celebrated instead. This person just ended their journey here and is on to the next and in my world we will see them again when our own journey comes to an end.
To morn is one of the experiences in Life, and it is really important to cry it out, to feel all the heavy painful feelings that comes in the experience of missing someone. I know its really really painful, and it takes over your whole world sometimes and for a lot of people that pain and darkness never ends.
But it doesn’t have to be that way.
I know it hurts like hell. I know that. But don’t get stuck there. Know that it’s only the end of their journey. You can’t do anything about it, you can’t change what happened, and you are still here living your Life so use this perspective if nothing else as a way out.
This way of thinking is what got me, my mom and my sister through the knowledge that she was dying right in front of our eyes. It helped us feel calm inside.
So many people have had near death experiences and said that it was the best feeling they ever had. Why is it so hard to believe that we are actually meant to be happy and feel good rather than the other way around? Why do the bad feelings so often win over the good ones?
Why is that?
Why do you often think the worst when you can think the best? What happened to make you automatically think bad instead of good as your first thought? Could it possibly be that you are listening to the wrong voice and you need to quiet that and choose another more reliable way to navigate through Life?
Like maybe what FEELS right.
What in your way of living would change if you knew right now that the voice in your head is not real, it’s just a scared little kid with a vivid imagination making up stories of the unknown with no truth to it what so ever.
If you knew that, would you still listen?
Try to not take other people’s predetermined judgment on things, find your own truth in everything instead and see how it feels for you. No experience feels the same for everyone, they are all different cause we are all unique. Not good or bad different, just different. Like day and night. None is better than the other. They just are. No judgment.
So if you get the insight that the biggest fear you have is again just a fear of the unknown and once you get there it will be a case of- “I don’t know what I was so scared of” then do you really have anything else to ever fear? If you realize that you biggest fear was never there, why not decide to start living instead of waiting to die. Enjoy the experience you are in right now, every moment of it! Find the beauty in everything around you, then everything around you becomes beautiful and remember the beauty in you, that’s the only thing true.
To change your thinking regarding fears to that kind of thinking is such a powerful change cause it changes everything. Don’t let fear take over your Life cause that will make you stop living, and that’s not why you are here. You came here to live Life so live it!
The way we’ve been doing things up until now has served its purpose. Why not start living the other way around. Earth is all about duality, big or small, hot and cold etc. one thing means nothing without the other. So why not choose happiness from here on out now that misery has been all lived out. Couldn’t that be a new way of Life?
Joy wouldn’t mean anything without sorrow so now that you have tried one to experience, why not try the other. It’s the total opposite of everything you know right now. Transmute all your worries and fears into courage, and fill your heart with faith, cause that feels great! Be in your flow wherever you go and never trust a fear know that it’s never really there.
Make this change for you.