First Love Yourself – The Rest Will Follow
Ahh the LOVE… The more you want it chasing it like crazy, the less you have it, right! Why is that? Can it be that you are looking for love in all the wrong places? Could it be that you jumped straight to the second step before even realizing there was a first?
Could it be that if you don’t take it step by step in the right order it all goes up in flames? How has it worked out for you so far?
The key to true happiness in my world is finding the inner strength to really fully, madly and deeply love your self. Looking for love in all other places first will get you nowhere but lost.
The first and most important place to look for love is within you. Once you have found that and really felt it, I mean truly felt the love for yourself really feeling like the beautiful amazing being that you are, then you can share your love with someone else equally whole to make it last.
It has to start with you though cause if you don’t love yourself you have nothing to give to anyone else, just emptiness. That’s the reason so many couples split, because they were never whole within to begin with and sooner or later that starts to show.
How do we get there? Why is it so incredibly hard to feel pure love for ourselves? What’s with all the resentment? Why is the need to get fake boobs, fake hair, fake lashes, fake nails, fake lips, fake nose, fake ass, crazy diets, fake eye color, hair color, the color of our teeth, skin etc etc etc FAKE FAKE FAKE! Why?!
Why do you think fixing anything on the outside will make you feel better on the inside? Why not try the other way around? Start with your inside and I promise you that everything on the outside will look and feel as perfect to you as it did to your mom and dad the day you were born, nothing but love for the perfection that’s you.
That hasn’t changed!
You are still perfect, the only thing that changed is your own view of yourself. It’s been distorted by your ego, so stop listening to that! Quiet the ego because no one can do anything with that maniac going on and on up there!
I think it’s really sad when people say that nobody’s perfect. WE ARE ALL PERFECT!! Get to that insight instead! We are all perfect in our own way exactly the way we are.
With the messed up ideals we have today on how you’re supposed to look it only adds fuel to the fire to make the statement that nobody’s perfect cause it will make people chase after something they already are thinking they’re not making themselves miserable. What’s perfect for you is most certainly not perfect for me cause we are all unique, so stop comparing yourself to others.
We are all amazing unique beautiful beings.
Be proud of YOU.
I started by looking back at my Life trying to find the exact moment when I lost myself. When I stopped being my own best friend and became my own worst enemy instead. I soon realized it was the moment when someone else got chosen instead of me right in front of my eyes. I’d been so close I could taste it, and then it was gone, just like that. That’s the moment I felt the feeling of not being enough. My first inner blocking.
Even though I had done everything “right” I didn’t “win” and that’s what set of my very long journey of never enough moments hating myself every step of the way. Back then it felt so clear to me, I had done my best and that wasn’t good enough so that’s got to mean that I am useless right, that whatever I am, I’m not enough.
I didn’t think in the terms of the bigger picture and meant to be at that point in my Life I was just a kid. That event set of an enormous amount of bad feelings within me and since I wasn’t aware of what had happened inside me I mistook the nasty voice in my head telling me I wasn’t pretty enough, skinny, enough, funny enough, interesting enough or beautiful enough to be true. I mistook it for being me, and kept listening to it, believing it, feeling worse and worse about myself by the minute.
That’s what the ego does to you.
That’s not a fun world to be in 24/7 I can tell you that. The only time however I did feel enough was when I poured booze down my throat or pills. How sad is that. Artificial love in a bottle or a jar. As much as I “loved” myself during intoxication, I hated myself the day after. Horrible way of living, trying to find love like that, and in the end all I found was the even nicer feeling self- loath.
So that’s how I started thinking, feeling and being all the time after that, and that resulted in 25 years of never being enough. That’s where my focus was so that’s the world I created for myself – The world of never enough. I can’t tell you how many many MANY times I have stumbled on the finish line always the runner up. It’s been the story of my Life up until 4 years ago when I found the missing piece of my puzzle.
I felt like I was flying! I was finally enough, and the more me I was the more love I got. It was the most intense passionate love I have ever experienced. I was all I ever wanted to be and more. I felt so incredibly alive and everything we did felt like the first time. I felt so safe, it was pure bliss!
He saw ME and fell in love with ME, the me I always wanted to be. Looking at it now it was the lost love for myself I found, and I didn’t even know it was gone that’s how lost I was!
He helped me see what I had in me.
Looking at him was like looking at a mirror. We were reflecting back and forth the total lack of self-love for ourselves. I’ve realized now that whatever happened was necessary to crack me open to release my old trapped lost self so I could be able to build myself back up again, but from love this time, with all the guidance I could possibly need from my heart instead to become my very lovely true self again.
It’s like I’m seeing things for the first time now, including me! I know I’m in the same world but it’s a whole other universe! It’s filled with love for everything I see including me. This is the real me, the me I’ve always wanted to be.
It was in me this whole time I was just too blind to see. Or I didn’t know that it was inside me I was supposed to look first! It was there all along. I wouldn’t have found it without the breaking of my heart though because it was so well hidden inside, but now I’ve set free all the beauty within me.
That whole blissful experience changed me to the core of my being, exactly the way it was meant to do, so thank you. It put a stop to the muddy and negative thinking that was me and opened me up to a whole new world.
My world, the way it’s supposed to be.
What looked like something “bad” turned out to be the best thing ever happening to me and I am forever grateful for that. I found the silver lining and now having taken a step back I see the bigger picture and that it was all meant to be.
I’m currently creating the life of my dreams living in the present moment not missing a thing. Learning how to fly is an amazing change because it lets you connect to yourself making it possible for all of your dreams to come true, being all that’s really you.
Another great thing about making these changes is that there is no going back once you reach a certain point, the old you doesn’t exist anymore. It’s been wiped out, so you are home free to be all you can be.
This is what worked for me.
I have also learned that once you hit the point of no return-LOVE will never again burn. YOU are the most important person in your Life. Always remember that.
BElieve in YOUrself.
I’ve decided to BE LOVE, because that’s what I want to see more of in the world. I’m going to be love to everyone I meet, to random people on the street and to everyone I see.
But most of all for the first time, I’m giving LOVE to ME.